


Fast As You Can

by leoben



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Crack, Gablepot, Jealousy, Kissing, M/M, Not Beta Read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-28
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-04-28 16:08:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5096867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leoben/pseuds/leoben
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mobster speed dating!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fast As You Can

**Author's Note:**

> Just a silly one-shot. Special thanks to [Millicentcordelia](http://archiveofourown.org/users/MillicentCordelia/pseuds/MillicentCordelia) for the encouragement and ideas (and speed dating research).

 

After months of pining over his boss and too many nights pathetically replaying little glances and touches in his head, Gabe decided to take his sister's advice and do something he never, ever, thought he'd do.

He was going to go speed dating.

Now, in his position, being a thug and all, Gabe figured he could make the excuse that this sort of thing just wasn't a viable option. Until Victor helpfully told him of an event specially designed for men and women in his area of work; gangsters, bodyguards, assassins, and everything in between.

So. Here he was, in a room full of at least 50 people, sweating through his suit and playing with his chain as he sat down. The rules seemed simple enough: half the people stayed seating and the other half moved from person to person when the timer rang. They even had scorecards to take notes, which made Gabe more anxious.

“Alright! Ladies! Gentlemen! Others!” The announcer said. “Ready...set...date!”

The first person to sit across from Gabe was one of Victor's henchwomen. Erika, he thought her name was. They stared at each other a moment before laughing nervously and chatting away for a few minutes. Before their time was up, she happened to glance over at the end of the table on Gabe's side and raise her brows. He followed her eyes and his blood ran cold when he saw Oswald. Their eyes met and Gabe quickly turned back.

There was a ding and Erika patted the top of his hand before moving on.

From then on, Gabe only pretended to make notes between people, looking over again every so often. Sometimes Oswald would be looking back, an unreadable expression on his face. It was so obvious how distracted Gabe was that word got around and most of his dates just ended up doodling or making eyes at people across the table. Gabe wasn't too put out; on the 8th date he indulged in self-pity as he watched Oswald laughing with a particularly fetching blond who resembled a detective whose name Gabe dare not utter, even in his own mind.

“So what do you like to do in your spare time?”

Gabe shook himself out of his reverie, not noticing that there was already someone new sitting across from him.

“Uhhhh.” Gabe coughed. “Sorry, what'd you say?”

The man rolled his eyes and very rudely wrote a few notes right in front of him.

During the 14th date, Gabe saw Oswald cover some greasy-looking fucker's hand with his own, turning his head towards the henchman every so briefly. Gabe couldn't stand it anymore. He got up and marched over to Oswald, ignoring the eyes on him.

“We're leaving,” he growled, not waiting for an answer as he headed towards the door. He only looked back as he opened it, surprised to see Oswald limping towards him. They walked in silence until they reached Gabe's car.

“Gabrie--” Oswald started to chide, squeaking as Gabe pushed him against the side of the Benz.

“Get in the car.” Gabe must have gotten a head injury along the line. Or maybe he was hallucinating, because his boss did as he was told, quickly opening the door and scrambling in. Gabe got in after him, shaking slightly and turning to the passenger seat. Oswald's eyes were wide and his pupils blown, looking at him expectantly.

The next few moments were a blur, Gabe suddenly having an armful of Oswald who was cursing the gear shift in between them and desperately trying to climb into Gabe's lap. The angle was all wrong but they couldn't care less as they groped each other through their jackets, kissing frantically.

Oswald moaned as Gabe slid his hand through his hair and pulled away. “You need to drive. _Now_.”

“Where to, Boss?” Gabe panted, burying his face in his neck. Oswald grinned and whispered in his ear, biting his lobe hard.

Gabe decided the hefty ticket he'd have to deal with for running through a red would be worth it.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I did more research on what kind of car Gabe possibly drives than anything. I'm pretty sure it's a Mercedes Benz of some sort. 
> 
> OH ALSO, the red light thing--he didn't get pulled over, I just figured that maybe Gotham has cameras on the lights like some cities do and then he gets a letter in the mail being like YOU RAN A RED ON THIS DATE, YOU OWE US $500.
> 
> And yes, I got the title from the Fiona Apple song because I couldn't think of a title and it's a great song, okay? Go listen to it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbxqtbqyoRk


End file.
